Divorce rates rise with cohabiting couples but WHY?

I was writing a paper on why cohabiting before settling down was good but when I look at statistics, divorce is higher with cohabiting couples than non-cohabiting couples. I cannot understand why that is. When you live with someone, you find out things about them. If you can't deal with some things, then don't get married. Why is divorce the divorce rate higher?Divorce rates rise with cohabiting couples but WHY?
wouldn't you know? you wrote the paper. I cohabited with my spouse before he was my spouse and we are still together 9 years now... infact in my circle of friends i know 3 couples who did not live together prior to marriage and their marriages ended. Don't think it has anything to do with cohabiting. that's just a stat made up by organized religion to keep society repressed and obedient.Divorce rates rise with cohabiting couples but WHY?
My husband and I lived together before we married. We did not split anything. We lived as a married couple, sharing payments, bills, household chores. He worked full time, while I went to college full time, worked part time, and cared for his two year old son. We had seperate bank accounts but only because we both decided we would wait until after the wedding to combine so we would not have to do paperwork twice. He would use his account to cash his check, keep some in his account to spend on gas and other things and give me the rest to put in my account so I could pay bills. It was never a matter of your money and my money, only whose bank account will we use today. We are still married with two other children now and show no signs of even discussing divorce anytime soon. We married for life.
Cohabiting makes or breaks the relationship. Communications is key; letting the other person know what you want is important. I was cohabiting with an ex for 6 years waiting on marriage. Unlike having separate lives, we shared almost everything. We had separate savings accounts but a joint checking account, we paid bills together and basically lived the married life without signing up for the husband and wife role. When I wanted to marry, he didn't think we needed to. Why buy the cow when you're already getting the milk for free?
I would hazard a guess that while people are cohabiting it is more like ';playing house.'; Other than sharing a bed and meals, people still have their own money, their own friends, pay their own bills and if there's a fight, one goes home to mom's for the night. Still two individuals.





Once people marry, they throw away the other safety nets, merge finances and everything else and going to mom's for the night is a different deal. Suddenly, they are not two individuals, they are a unit.





Also, the rules for marriage are different. Expectations of behavior are different--people compare it to their parents' marriages. I see it all the time over in Singles/Dating: Guys say what they won't do once they're married that they think is okay now. Problem is, no one is teaching young people what addictive behaviors are all about.
In todays society marriage is not taken seriously by many people. People date and break up and they marry and get divorced, not a big deal sadly.
Because no matter what cohabitation is not marriage. People are more likely to show their true colors after there is a legal contract that makes it harder for them to walk out.





I have noticed that in general, the longer they lived together the shorter the marriage usually lasts.
People are busy and don't spend time together. People don't realize marriage takes work. People expect a marriage like on TV. People who refuse to cohabitate usually have higher morals and respect marriage more. Lower divorce rate does not mean happier, it may just mean they stay together more often when not happy.
im guessing its because its hard to go from being 2 seperate people with 2 separate bank accounts, 2 separate tax things, splitting the bills, splitting payments, to being a team with shared everything can be nervewracking
Because marriage is based on the premise of commitment


and cohabitation is based on


';try it on to see if it fits, and if it doesn't then-don't buy it!';





There is no reason to ';try out being married'; because either you are committed to each other and spending the rest of your life together or you are not.





Divorce is a result of lazy people not maintaining the relationship-and that has nothing to do with living to gether
They've had a head start on the relationship breakdown is all.
I guess that proves that a little piece of paper DOES change things. Marriage is NOT just a piece of paper. It's a committment.





When I didn't have that piece of paper, I refused to cook, clean or wash clothes for boyfriends. Guess that was a special part of me I saved just for my husband!
My husband and i moved in together 3 months before we got married and have been happily married almost 18 yrs.





Divorce isn't in our future that's for sure.
i think people who don't live together prior to the marriage have more traditional views and hence don't believe in divorce. you marry forever.